I worked from home today, and took a brief afternoon break down at my swimming pool. Before I hopped in, the Russian lifeguard (aren't they always from the Eastern Bloc?) called everyone out for ten minutes. I couldn't understand her broken English, but figured the pool needed cleaning or chlorine.

Ten minutes later she blew the whistle and I took a dip. Then she walked towards me. "...Pool...out...," she said. That was all I got. Not the best time for a language barrier.

I climbed out. "But you blew the whistle," I said.

"I know. I sorry...acid."

"You're adding acid to the pool? Do I need to shower?"

"You might want...don't have to...I would."

"OK....will I be safe if I do not shower?" I said. Will my skin fall off?


"...Go shower."

I showered and waited for her next non-accidental whistle blow. I also waited for someone else to jump in first. A little boy took the initiative. After he seemed fine, I followed suit.

Lesson: Always make sure the guinea pig is someone vulnerable like a child or the elderly. If they can survive then it's a good bet that you can, too.